Our Deepest Fear Is That We Are Powerful Beyond Measure

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? "

I love hearing women, moments after they have given birth, reflect on their amazing strength. They say with wonder that they never knew they had it in them.

And after reading the above excerpt from a prayer by Marianne Williamson, I asked myself, what if women knew this about themselves before going into labor? Maybe some do, but they are unconscious to their strength. Maybe some have an inkling, but they don't have the self-confidence to admit it fully. Perhaps some are afraid of seeming boastful, particularly in regards to childbirth, an event that they may not have experienced before.

There is powerful fear about childbirth and pain. "Laboring Under an Illusion" is only one of the commentaries out there that examines the way popular media depicts birth, and how those depictions shape our beliefs about labor and delivery. Prime time TV, Lifetime Television, and The Discovery Channel show women giving birth in car accidents, under the threat of a medical complication, or in klutzy, slapstick fashion that parodies our accepted assumption that childbirth is inherently dangerous and humanly impossible without medical intervention.

I work with clients prenatally to acknowledge their previous experiences of strength and endurance, both physical and mental, mind-over-matter, sheer will. I try to help them see how there is a strength within them that they have already called upon. And although we almost always have some point of reference that proves to them their power, the image of television birth and the war stories told to them by their friends are pervasive and creep into the little cracks of their otherwise solid foundation.

And so when a woman is marveling at her own power moments after she has given birth, at the miracle of what her body has made, I want to whisper to her: "You knew it all along."

The entire poem by Reverend Marianne Williamson can be found here.

.

And if YOU saw this sign at your OB's office...

...what would you do?

So much has been blogged, Facebooked, and tweeted about this photo that I just had to jump on the bandwagon.

But the good thing is that Jill at The Unnecesarean is sponsoring a wonderful photoshop contest, for women to write in their spoof of this sign. See the entries, and celebrate your right to fully informed consent and choices in your health care.

One of the things I treasure about being a doula (and it's not spelled with an "h" for crying out loud!)is working with women who are exercising their autonomy - with decision-making, with marathon strength, with purposeful surrender. Even if you need the most medically-oriented birth, you have the right to participate in your care and explore all your options!

.

September Snapshots

There are moments that will stick with me forever from this September:

-- Baby Ryan's parents: laughing and smiling as he entered the world so quietly, so gently.

-- What autonomy, what I value most in my work, looks like: Client F, who labored through the night and was admitted at 9cm, said to me: "An epidural was always a part of the plan. I'm not ready to deliver yet, and I need to sleep before I start pushing."

-- The power of love from a visitor: as the long night stretched into the day which also wore on, with virtually no change in the cervix whatsoever, Client A's best friend came into the room. The husband and best friend embraced the mother in an intimate circle and simply held her, overcoming the resignation in the room with love.

-- The muscular, sinewy strength of a laboring mother, whose low moans began ending in grunty pushes, reaffirming that birth is the most primal of all instincts.

Thank you to all my September families, for the privilege to participate.

.

It's National Midwifery Week!

Please celebrate National Midwifery Week by honoring your midwife. What is ONE word that comes to mind when you think about your birth experience with your midwife?

I choose collaborative.

And to add, I will thank her again and again for how we worked together on my pregnancy and my daughter's birth, but also for how she shaped my work as a doula.

.

Is Your Hospital Listed Here?

As of July 2009, there are 83 hospitals in the US that have been evaluated and deemed "Baby Friendly" by the Baby Friendly Hospital Initiative.

To be included on the list, facilities must meet 10 criteria, created by the World Health Organization, encourage breastfeeding by helping mothers initiate breastfeeding, appropriately training all staff, avoiding formula unless medically indicated, allowing “rooming in,” and other practices. These steps are also included among the Ten Steps for Mother-Friendly Care outlined for the Mother-Friendly Childbirth Initiative.

I'm surprised by this list -- I thought that a few more Boston area hospitals would be listed, and the single one that did is not the one I anticipated.

Hospital Based Doulas, Johns Hopkins

Here is a quick and simple article about how hospital-based doulas can enrich a woman's birthing experience. Note that the experience is mother-centered; the doulas do not have an ideal birth in mind for the mom, but they are there to support the mother and her needs as she defines them.

Unfortunately, the only two Boston area birth center/hospital-based doula programs have been wildly cut in the recession, with budgets for only the absolute, highest-risk mothers.
.

More Labor Support is Necessary in Canada -- and in the US, too!

From The Daily News out of Canada, an article on how labor support can reduce surgical births by as much as 20%.

I'm curious as to what guidelines the Canadian Society of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists feel aren't being followed, guidelines that are aimed towards lowering unnecessary surgeries. From what I admit can be a jaded point of view, I'd never think that the American College of OB/GYNs would describe any surgeries as unnecessary, especially because hospital guidelines which dictate how a woman should labor seem to be in place for lowering unnecessary liability more than anything else. Hospital c-section is considered the gold standard of life-saving hospital care, which I think it can be when c-sections are truly necessary - but not when they are the self-fulfilling prophesies of labor practices that are not mother- and birth-friendly.
.

Radical Doula

My blog post regarding the death of Dr. George Tiller caught the eye of Miriam Perez, an editor at Feministing. Miriam is also a doula and women's health activist who chronicles her work at Radical Doula.

Miriam interviewed me via email regarding my work as a doula, and I'm flattered to be featured by her work. Thank you, Miriam!

.

A Tale of Two Birth Centers: Massachusetts and New Hampshire

I belong to a really wonderful and supportive e-network of doulas in Massachusetts. The members provide a wealth of information and a depth of experience from which I am lucky to be learning. Just this week, one of the doulas wrote that she was compiling a list of Birth Centers in Massachusetts and nearby New Hampshire.

A list of Birth Centers in Massachusetts is not hard to compile, as there are all of two, and they are not without their controversies. The Cambridge Birth Center has a high transfer rate to Cambridge Hospital, and The North Shore Birth Center, in order to avoid closure, will comply with remote external fetal monitoring by OB's at the North Shore Hospital on the campus.

But then there's New Hampshire, with its 5 birth centers: The Birth Cottage, The Monadnock Birth Center, The Coastal Family Birth Retreat, The Concord Birth and Wellness Center, and The Longmeadow Farm and Birthing Home. All safe, non-medical, home-like environments that offer the CHOICE to birth at their center or at home! They are all owned and run by midwives, mostly licensed NH midwives and one or two Nurse-Midwives. Each of the websites has legislative updates on the status of midwifery, insurance, and homebirth in New Hampshire. One web site states it so plainly: Almost all insurance plans now cover out-of-hospital birth services with a NH Certified Midwife. It's a sentence that almost strikes me as funny, since it is so far from Massachusetts truth.


As a proponent for choices in childbirth, I have alway philosophically maintained that the 2 Birth Centers we have here in MA offer a middle-of-the-road choice between homebirth and hospital births. But when I hear what is happening just over the border (the MA/NH border, not the US/Canadian border!), I do worry about some of the ways Massachusetts Birth Centers are forced to operate if they are to be in existence at all. Tomorrow, the MA Joint Committee will hear Senate Bill 847, which creates a Massachusetts Board of Midwifery, which would make the practice of midwifery similar to New Hampshire's. Until that bill is passed, the 2 birth centers we do have - operating under the heavy thumb of their affiliated hospitals -- will struggle to maintain choices for pregnant women in Massachusetts.

.

Mind-over-matter, Butt-over-head

Last week, my client due next was found to have a breech baby. Determined to birth vaginally and without medication, she spent the better part of the next week lying down with her hips higher than her head, visualizing her baby spinning, and visiting an acupuncturist and a chiropractor trained in the Webster technique. She went in this week (36 weeks) for an external version, which many women describe as painful, pressured, and ultimately unsuccessful.

She said her OB kneaded her belly, gave a little push, then shrugged. "All set," she said.

"That's it?" asked my client.

Her OB nodded. "Baby's vertex."

Victory! A successful, easy version! I have to think that all the work my client did made it easier for the OB to spin the baby.

And now back to birth-planning...

.